How we feel about ourselves is reflected in the relationships we attract. Why is that? Well, in the world of energy, like attracts like. What you believe about yourself will be the same belief of the person you attract. Your beliefs, and the feelings that go along with them, calibrate how positive or negative your vibrational frequency is. Positive is healthy while negative is not, however both are magnetic. Do you feel differently about yourself when you are in an intimate love relationship? Are you a different person at home than you are outside of it? Hmmm, why is that?
Initially, we experience or witness the way love is expressed through our greatest influencers – our families, particularly our mother and father. How you were given and received love personally is a factor but so is how your parents treated each other as partners. Was someone a giver and the other a taker? Who got the love and power and how did they get it? Witnessing that experience in childhood is a mighty powerful influencer. Fast forward to who you are now, are you either one of them?
The biggest theme I have seen working with my clients as well as myself on my own journey, is the feeling of not being good enough. Its amazing how many different ways that same feeling can be expressed by each person in a relationship. One of the most common love relationships is between one person who is dominant and another who is submissive.
In one partner a feeling of not being good enough can be masked by a fear of abandonment that creates a personality style driven to control through intimidation or through neediness, both of which hold a victim consciousness. This personality requires constant reassurance, is self centered and looks for intimate “light” relationships. They do not trust and are not fully emotionally available due to their belief that they will be left. They constantly set high standards for their partners so that they are always working to earn their approval and earn their love. There is a feeling of never being able to please this person because it never seems to be enough. You are right, it is not enough, and never will be because they do not want you to stop proving that you love them.
The vibrational match to this type of personality, also an expression of not being good enough, is a partner who is a people pleaser, the over giver. Their thinking is usually that “If you are happy, I’m happy,” I know that for myself it was. There is a need to prove one’s love in order to receive appreciation and value and they are willing to self-sacrifice their own happiness to do it. They can become self imposed emotional slaves to earn the approval of the one they love. Both types enable each other, one over gives and the other, over needs.
Letting go of the limiting belief that you are not good enough is the key to releasing so many other insecurities that drive behaviour and your vibrational frequency. Through the SoulChild Connection we can identify where that belief anchored in you so that you can start to see the truth of why you think the way you think.
Join myself and Heather Hannan as we explore more on relationships and how limiting beliefs affect our view of ourselves and what we need to do in order to be loved. Enjoy a healing SoulChild meditation during our time together. I look forward to sharing with you at
Joshua Creek Heritage Art Centre
April 29th 2017
10 am – 12 pm
$22.00 if pre-registered
$30.00 at the door
Pre-register at Catherine@SoundReiki.com